Unfriending?   1 comment

I’ve been on Facebook for 8 years now and I’d like to know how to trim my friend list without hurting anyone’s feelings.

Does anyone have advice for me?

Honestly, many of the people I friended or approved when they friended me, my intention in cases where I did not know them very well already was that being on Facebook together with them would expand our relationship and allow me to get to know them more personally.

I guess that was naive.  There appears to be no substitute for face-to-face time for building a friendship.  Trying to chat it up with someone on Facebook, by liking the photos they post of their kids, and chiming in when they share a funny status, just doesn’t move the friendship into the new world of intimacy.

I also have figured out that Facebook is not the way extend an invitation.  If I want to actually get together with someone, a phone call would be more efficient.  Planning things on Facebook can stretch out into months.

So how do I get to what I want Facebook to be–that it can realistically be?  I want it to reconnect and keep up with the friends that I have blessedly accumulated over a lifetime (and yes, I have friends there I’ve known since second grade).  I want to stay connected with my current friends, and share photos and updates.  I like it as a forum to share ideas, questions and blog posts.  But that’s really it.

Is there any diplomatic way to unfriend all the random people I know are safe, but who never write me or comment on my statuses?  I want more than a tally of who clicked “approve” out of my time on Facebook.

What to do?


Posted February 17, 2016 by swanatbagend in friendship

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One response to “Unfriending?

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  1. When casual acquaintances unfriend me, I usually don’t notice. When people I’ve had relationships with but have fallen out of touch with unfriend me, it hurts.

    If you’re looking for more privacy, you can create custom friends lists and your posts will only be visible to the people in the list. If you’re wanting to have fewer people in your timeline, you can “unfollow” people.

    I choose to keep everyone who friends me (I generally don’t send requests) because I don’t want anyone to feel rejected. I don’t know what each person is going through, but I’d like to think that I would be there for any person that needed me. Since I don’t know how much my unfriending may affect someone else, I just don’t do it.

    That’s my 2 cents.

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