I Have a Life

I’ve been working through my latest lab results, and how I’m feeling, and re-reading a book about autoimmune disease and health that I read before…and I feel myself going back into research mode.

I really don’t know that I have a choice in the sense that while I’m back on the thyroid medication I prefer, finally, after a full year of dealing with different medications in an effort to chase away premature ventricular contractions, I don’t feel as well as I was hoping and expecting to.  The PVCs were horrible when they started last April, keeping me up all night many nights.  So I had to go off thyroid medication altogether for a while, which caused me to gain some weight.  I had to get my iron levels up high enough to ward off the PVCs, and the process plain took longer than I wanted.

So, here I am, supposedly back where I was two years ago.  Only I’m not.

I have a few other issues I didn’t have then and the mediation doesn’t seem to be doing what it was then.

So what do I do?

Back to the drawing board.  Is there a different medication I could take?  How can I help my digestion?  Should I change my diet?  Drop the fish oil?  Change the type of magnesium?  Change the B complex?  Would a sleep study be beneficial?  Something else to support the adrenals?

There are quite a few questions, but the main one is this.

How much effort am I supposed to put into trying for better health?

Would it be better to stop spending valuable time reading and researching and live my life as it is?

I get drawn into the complexities, and sometimes I find myself thinking about nothing else throughout the day but my recurring questions about the health strategies I’ve been reading about.  Then I ask myself, what kind of life is that?

Maybe I should just give it up, accept how I am doing for how I am doing, and make the best of it.

But those of you who know me well know I am not the kind of person who gives up when faced with an obstacle.  Hermione-like, I turn to the library of information in an effort to find a solution.

I just don’t want to spend most of my life–trying to fix my life.