Archive for the ‘anniversary’ Tag

So Loved   Leave a comment

How could I be so loved?

I know for sure I didn’t deserve it.  I mean, yes, I work hard, I try to be a decent person, but really, I fail at meeting my own goals as well as other people’s expectations.  He couldn’t have been rewarding me for doing well and never being a whiner! because that just doesn’t happen.

He knows what I like and what is most relaxing and peaceful for me, and after months of some stressful times, we went and stayed somewhere we love.  We saw natural beauty and were out in it, hiking to a waterfall among thick forest.  We had brownies and Cokes in the afternoon.  We had a four course dinner.  It was amazing!  It was a true feast, in the best sense of the word, because we were there together, eating some of the most delightful food I’ve had in years, and celebrating all that is good in our lives and all we’ve been given.

Not only that, as a further surprise, he took me to a pottery shop, where we sat down with an instructor and two other women who were there, and made our very own ice cream dishes on the wheel!  We were engaged in freakin’ arts and crafts–together!

My husband insisted that we get away for our thirtieth wedding anniversary.  He arranged it all himself, planning some specifics that he knew I would enjoy, but not over-booking us, so that the prime detail was our companionship.  He wasn’t just tolerating the hike, my talking, and pottery making.  There weren’t any loud, pregnant sighs as there have been in the past when we stayed in a bookstore too long.  I’d have to say from everything I observed and experienced–and at this point, I do know him quite well–that he really just wanted to be with me.

Somewhere along the way, a shift happened, and he isn’t doing these things to get a certain outcome.  His commitment to me has transformed.  He just wants to love the beloved.

This, my friends, is the mystery.

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Posted August 10, 2018 by swanatbagend in relationships

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Anniversary   Leave a comment

Not much blogging going on here this summer, but today I have something worth saying.

Today is my 27th wedding anniversary, and that is worth celebrating.

I remain awed by the kindness that my husband routinely shows to me, and amazed that, after all this time, we still like each other.  I know not every married couple is so fortunate as to actually continue to like each other.  Sure, the two of us never had that much in common (although we convinced ourselves we did at the ripe old ages of 19 and 23) but we just plain like spending time together.  I’m glad that is still true.

Every now and then I reflect on what my mom said when I asked her before I got married what she thought of my fiance.  The only thing she was able to come up with at the time was “He’ll always be nice to you.”  That doesn’t sound like much of an endorsement, does it?  Well, she wasn’t sure of him at the time, and I suspect she wanted to come up with something acceptable to say since she couldn’t say she was crazy about him.

But, it turns out she was right and that really was an essential quality in him which I’m grateful for every day.

I had a friend from high school comment on our marriage several years ago and her words have stayed with me as well.  She just told me that not many people are blessed to have a love like I do.  I am sorry to have to sit and think about that, for sure.  But what she did was teach me not to take it for granted.  He’s good to live with, a good friend, a good lover, and a great companion: while life always has its difficulties, he’s not the source of the difficulties.  Without her comment I think I would overlook, in the every-day, the amazing reality that I am married to a kind and faithful person.

This is true love–you think this happens every day?

 

Posted July 30, 2015 by swanatbagend in gratitude

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